The Dilettantes

Alex Belmont is in his fourth and final year at Simon Fraser University. But instead of looking forward to a bright future, he's wondering what the hell he's going to do with a humanities degree. And he's thinking about girls. Why does he have such terrible luck with girls? And what's the point of writing for the school newspaper? No one even cares about the damn thing.
But when a conglomerate threatens the very existence of the school paper, Alex suddenly has a mission, a purpose: it's up to him and an unlikely group of fellow students to defeat their rival and save The Peak—whatever the cost.
Following in the great tradition of campus novels such as Lucky Jim and Mean Boy, The Dilettantes offers a deeply funny look at the quixotic world of academic life and student journalism in the 21st century.

Table of Contents

Table of Contents
Front Cover 1
Simon Fraser University Campus Map 2
Half Title Page 3
Title Page 5
Copyright Page 6
Dedication 7
Table of Contents 9
Epigraph 11
Jsut 13
Unconfirmed Sources 23
Comic Sans 35
Big Lipton 51
What Colour is a Sunset? 59
Clubs Days Sign-up Sheet—Final 69
Those Squiggles Are What We Call Punctuation 71
The Worst Thing Ever 85
Style Guide 107
A Tale of Tutorials 109
No Soap Radio 119
'Back to School' for Troubled Holtz 129
Stet/Sic 131
The Board Meeting 153
Collected Poems 155
FPA 137 Syllabus, Spring 2009 167
Triple Nope 169
Irregularities on the Campaign Trail 195
Nerves 203
Method Acting 211
One Hundred Beers 223
Claude’s Interlude 227
All Those Sad Little Jump Kicks 229
Arts/Crafts 241
Duncan Holtz — Internet Movie Database 247
Konw 251
One Hundred and One Beers 263
Acknowledgements 271